Admission To An Acute Psychiatric Unit

Friday the 9th January 2018

What Happened Leading Up To This Date
I were doing really well in every aspect of my life. I were really happy thoroughly enjoying my life in the countryside with my therapy dog Molly , taking for her walks in different parts of the surrounding countryside all within a ten minute reach of my home . I recall the only negative thing that occurred were I lost my job in events around the end of Christmas/beginning of January , a job I thoroughly enjoyed and which I always put 110% into everything I did at various locations in Manchester , mainly event city in Trafford Park .

Crashing Down

On Friday the 19th of January of 2018 I impulsive took an overdose of my medication , a combination of Quetiapine and Promethazine , subsequently an ambulance was called and I were taken to Blackburn Hospital where I were monitored and transferred to a ward .

The following day I were assessed by two nurses from the crisis team , I explained to them I don’t know what happened I was really happy and then I came crashing down , I also explained to them that I’ve been hearing voices and having intrusive intense thoughts to harm and kill others and that I wish the overdosed had killed me , the two nurses said I needed to be placed on a section , but of course with it being the weekend their were no beds . So I jus had to stay on the ward under constant observation until their were bed availability , I couldn’t help feeling like a fraud sat amongst really sick elderly patients and in the knowledge that if their were a bed another really sick patient could of had mine , but I knew it wasn’t my fault , as the bed shortage crisis is just getting worse and worse each and every year .

Punishing Myself

On the ward at Blackburn I had stopped eating completely and began to vomit constantly , so i were prescribed nourishment drinks which can only be given by a qualified healthcare professional for those who are malnourished , have an eating disorder or are unable to eat solid food .

January the 22nd 2018

I were informed that a bed has become available for me on the Shakespeare Ward at the Harbour Hospital in Blackpool , my only massive feeling of relief were knowing I’m going to the best hospital in Lancashire , I were there previously in 2016 and it’s a really supportive therapeutic unit .
I were placed on level two observation levels which means patients that are on these are checked every 10 mins . I were for the first week going so light headed and dizzy , I felt so close to passing out , on one dizzy spell as I were falling down I banged my head . I felt so incredibly weak I were shuffling tiny little steps everywhere like and elderly lady , holding onto every chair and wall so I didn’t fall again , the wall walk was very supportive holding me up all of the time .

I’ve had a few self harming incidents .

I am still detained under the mental health act and I still want to end my life .

My diagnosis is that of Bipolar Disorder , emotionally unstable borderline personality disorder & anxiety . I over the past two or three years have also developed increasing anxiety surrounding food , and now because i want to die as a form of punishing myself it’s got to the point where I am not eating at all .

Blogging Is Therapy

Ive always had a passion for writing , and blogging for some can be like an online public diary . I write to raise awareness of ill mental health & sometimes I will publish posts like this to give an insight to what it’s like to live with a mental illness . My illness stem from pregnancy , hence the aptly named title of Mental Health support worldwide and support in pregnancy & motherhood . If you would like a real insight into an acute mental health ward , I also have a Facebook page filled with lots of live videos , here is the link – Mental Health support worldwide and support in pregnancy & motherhood .

I will end this piece with the inspiration behind my blog & everything I do .

Taliana

Becky

Advertisements

Proud Mummy Moment 😊 xx

Can’t believe she’s a month old already it goes so quick. She’s turning her head & she’s started to smile & she’s been lifting her head up for the past week or so now . She’s doing really well & is very advanced for her age considering she should only b about a week old now . She’s gorgeous I’d do anything for her I nvr want to let her go wen I’m holding her πŸ™‚ xx

  

Can’t believe how much I’ve achieved & how much my life has changed forever since becoming a Mum , it really is life changing but yet oh so rewarding πŸ‘ΆπŸ˜ŠπŸ‘Ά

Happy blogging 

Love Becky & Baby πŸ˜ŠπŸ‘ŒπŸ˜Š

  

I’ve reached the finishing line πŸ‘ŒπŸ˜ŠπŸ‘Œ

My 8 month #pregnancy journey #finally #made it . So proud she’s finally here πŸ˜ŠπŸ‘ΆπŸ˜Š . I wouldn’t of got through the past 8 months as well as I have without my amazing midwife, I can’t thank her enough πŸ‘Œ .

ο»Ώο»Ώ

I have borderline personality disorder, I’ve known this for several years.

This pregnancy @ around 4-5 months pregnant I was diagnosed with Bipolar aswell shortly after being discharged from hospital.   My 1st pregnancy I was severely unwell, it hasn’t been as stressful as my 1st , but it’s still been 1 hell of a ride , especially with the stress of the social services involvement thrown in .

But hey I’m really proud of myself, I held my baby girl I had skin to skin contact, I wasn’t allowed to hold my 1st . 

ο»Ώο»Ώ

This time I haven’t relapsed, I’m WELL I’ve done it , I’m so PROUD of myself & we r CELEBRATING . 

So happy news πŸ‘Œ

Happy blogging 

Love Becky & Baby πŸ˜ŠπŸ‘ΆπŸ˜Š